Beer & Diapers

Memoirs of a millennial dad

Halloween Costume Shopping

Kate and I make the mistake of taking a two-year-old to Halloween City after dinner. I try unsuccessfully to convince Kate to dress as a naughty nun, Greek goddess, or French maid. Kate says she doesn’t know the difference between ancient Egyptian and ancient Greek costumes. I slip into history nerd mode and say that the styles of costumes couldn’t be more different, unless of course you’re talking about Cleopatra who was actually descended from the Greeks who conquered Egypt under Alexander the Great.

Meanwhile, Daniel sees Halloween City as a slightly more dangerous version of Toys R Us. He zips up and down the aisles, squealing with delight as he finds the kid’s costume section and terror when he comes face-to-face with Freddy. I have to chase Daniel for several aisles after he runs away with a Captain America shield. The staff have a great time with it, but some of the teenage girls trying to find a last minute costume are slightly annoyed.

The saddest part of the evening is taking Daniel to the bathroom on the second floor. From the next level I could see all the literary quotations left over from when the building was a Borders Bookstore. I feel extremely saddened that a store specializing in cheap Halloween props is booming while book stores just can’t keep the lights on. Who needs Shakespeare, Dickens, or Maya Angelou when you can dress up like Charlie Sheen or Snookie?


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